After the Gun Goes Bang, Bang, Bang
by HBCarolyn
Summary: A slightly different take on what happens after the finale. One shot.


After the Gun Goes Bang, Bang, Bang

Maura nervously paced the hospital waiting room. She was oblivious to everything around her. Frost and Korsak kept glancing over at her, wondering if they should offer to escort her home until Jane was out of surgery. Maura felt like she was fidgeting the time away, hoping Jane would survive.

Jane. The love of her life, although she never told her. The many times they spent the night at each other's home, the nights Jane shared a bed with her, Maura craved the closeness of Jane's body and often wished she could tell Jane how she felt about her. Now Jane was on a surgeon's table, fighting for her life.

"Jane Rizzoli?" Maura didn't see the doctor come through the OR doors. She whirled around.

"Yes, we're here for Jane," she answered and gave her ring one last twist. She felt Frost and Korsak join her.

"Wait, where are Jane's parents? They should be here, too," Korsak said. The doctor shook his head.

"They've already received the news. I found them in their son's room."

"What news was that, Doctor?" Maura asked. Just then she heard Angela sobbing down the hallway. All three saw Frank Sr. half carrying his wife, tears streaming down his face. Maura suddenly felt her stomach clench and she almost bent double.

"I'm sorry, we lost her twenty minutes ago. The damage was too great to be able to repair," the doctor said. Maura heard her blood rushing in her ears and the hospital floor rose up to meet her.

Maura returned to her apartment. Frost and Korsak accompanied her as far as the front door but Maura couldn't bear having company. She wanted to collapse as soon as she could, the pain was more than she could bear.

Jane was gone. Her best friend, the woman she worked with, looked forward to seeing each morning, hearing her smoky voice as they talked, teased, argued and flirted with one another was no more.

Maura opened her apartment door, stepped inside, and screamed.

Officers from all over the state attended Jane's funeral. The FBI was well represented, too, although Gabriel Dean looked so stoic he looked as if his face was about to collapse.

Maura was numb. She sat with all the Rizzolis in the family section. Walking into the church had been extremely difficult; a large picture of Jane in uniform greeted the mourners and it was all Maura could do to keep her composure. Jane's smile was spectacular in real life, and the photo of her showed that. She enjoyed being a cop.

Lt. Cavanaugh spoke of Jane's dedication to her job; Korsak and Frost spoke of her as the perfect partner. Frankie talked of the big sister he enjoyed teasing as he grew up then admired her becoming a cop. Frankie choked up as he finished his eulogy: "She was the best big sister a guy could ever have. I'll miss you everyday of my life, Janie."

Maura couldn't stand the idea of going to the cemetery and watch Jane's coffin be lowered into the ground. The thought of Jane's wild hair, chocolate brown eyes and voice being silenced forever and confined to the hard ground was more than she could bear. Maura knew her life had been altered forever. She expected to spend it with Jane. Now Jane was dead.

"I didn't even get to do your autopsy," Maura murmured to herself as she drove home. "Although that was for the best, I suppose. It's a little disturbing to cut into someone you loved while they're dead on your table."

"How am I going to go to work tomorrow?" Maura asked herself. She changed into an old pair of sweats and t-shirt Jane left behind one morning. Maura imagined she could hear Jane in her apartment: "Come on, Maura, you have a job to do. They're waiting for you. The dead need to speak." That's true, Maura thought. The dead tell tales of their last encounter on this earth and needed Maura to translate for them.

_We don't even have a case to close on Jane, _Maura thought. _Jane's killer died at her own hand. I don't even have a chance to avenge her death._

Joe Friday jumped into Maura's lap and licked her face. "I know, sweetie, you lost your Mom and I lost my best friend. Here, let's go for a walk. Maybe we'll both feel better," Maura said to the dog, although in her mind she added, _I doubt it._

Six Months Later

"What do you have, Frost?" Maura asked the detective who came barreling into the autopsy room like he was about to give birth.

"The FBI kept working a special case, Dr. Isles. The indictments came down this morning. They indicted four of their own of murder with special circumstances."

"Who did they murder?" Dr. Isles asked, amazed.

"Jane Rizzoli."

"What?" Dr Isles asked, finding a chair to collapse into. "I thought Bobby Marino was working alone." Frost shook his head.

"No, apparently when they finished up the files on Jane's shooting additional evidence came up that implicated a larger ring. Korsak was in on it from our end, but he said he only observed and retrieved records, things like that. All four of their investigators had ties to Bobby Marino's dirty cocaine operation for several years. One of them is being called the ringleader."

"Wait, it isn't Dean is it?" she asked.

"No, he was the lead investigator for our team," Korsak came around the corner from the elevator.

"I came down to tell Dr. Isles, I hope that was okay," Frost said.

"Of course, Frost. I'm glad you told her before she heard it over the news. The media is eating this up," Korsak replied. Maura stared at the body she'd been autopsying when Frost came in. She couldn't remember where she left off. Korsak bent down to take her hands and look in her eyes.

"We all loved Janie and want her back, but that's impossible, Maura. We can be thankful all of her killers will be held accountable for what happened that day."

Maura pulled her hands away and buried her face in them. Uncontrollable sobs shook her shoulders. Korsak pulled her to him and held her while she cried. Frost retreated from the room, unable to handle the emotions of a woman he called The Queen of the Dead. Korsak continued to hold Maura. She stopped crying and pulled away from Korsak.

"I want to be at the trial," she said. He nodded. "Me, too."

It took another six months but the day finally arrived. Maura stepped smartly up the steps to the federal courthouse where the prime FBI investigator was being tried for cocaine trafficking and money laundering, among other charges. Maura only wished they could charge him with murder for Jane's death but the Attorney General's office explained that Jane's death was too remote an event to be connected to the trafficking charges. "Please understand, Dr. Isles, we want to charge him with murder, actually murder in the first degree with special circumstances, but since Det. Rizzoli pulled the trigger herself, it's too farfetched a legal theory. Trust that we'll get a conviction on the charges we have filed. Det. Rizzoli's death will be brought out for the jury to consider, in both the opening and closing statements, but we cannot get a conviction for her death." Maura nodded, understanding the theory but hating that Jane's death was only a sidebar.

The courthouse was swarming with people, media personnel, and various cops and detectives. Maura nodded hello to those she knew. Gabriel Dean watched her from the top of the steps and took her arm when she reached him.

"Are you sure you should be here, Dr. Isles?" he asked.

"Yes, of course. Jane was my best friend. I wanted to be here for this-for her."

"You're going to hear some disturbing things, I'm afraid."

"Agent Dean, you're forgetting I'm a medical doctor. The only reason I didn't do Jane's autopsy was because Lt. Cavanaugh thought it might be too traumatic for me. I can handle the evidence."

Dean nodded and they entered the courtroom together. Maura chose a seat on the aisle, two rows behind the prosecution's table. She looked at the accused, relieved she didn't recognize him.

At nine the bailiff called for them to rise for the judge's entrance. Seated once again Maura looked over the jury. Seven men and five women sat solemnly watching the prosecutor. The assistant attorney general outlined the case for the jury in his opening statement. The investigation into the cocaine trafficking was detailed. He outlined all of the charges being brought and told the jury they would be hearing convincing evidence that Agent Andrews was guilty of all charges. As he started to wind down his opening statement Maura heard him mention Jane.

"A year ago a Boston homicide detective named Jane Rizzoli made a sacrifice for this case that we cannot repay. When Bobby Marino killed his partner Jane Rizzoli gunned him down for us. In the ensuing investigation we found links between Agent Andrews and Det. Marino that were disturbing to say the least. Det. Rizzoli shot Det. Marino while he was holding her hostage. She shot him through herself. Now ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that is a gutsy move. Her brother was gravely wounded and trapped in the morgue of the Boston PD headquarters. In an effort to bring the hostage situation to a close Det. Rizzoli did what no one else could do-she shot a dirty cop. We owe Det. Rizzoli a debt of gratitude, for in cleaning up the case Agent Gabriel Dean, a colleague of the accused, found credible evidence that this was more than just one dirty cop in league with a street gang for easy money."

The judge recessed the courtroom for an early lunch. Maura went into the cafeteria for a cup of coffee and once again found Agent Dean at her elbow.

"No lunch for Dr. Isles?" he asked.

"I find it's easier to sit through upsetting situations on an empty stomach, Agent Dean."

"Gabriel. I'm sorry for your loss, Maura, I know Jane meant a great deal to you."

Maura stared down at the table. "This year has been hard for all of us, Gabriel. Jane left large footprints no one can fill."

He stared at her for a moment longer. He looked as if he wanted to say something more then thought better of it.

"I need to make a few phone calls before the fireworks start this afternoon. I'm the first witness after lunch. See you later?" he said and Maura nodded. She sipped her coffee until time to return to the courtroom.

Maura was surprised to find how exciting she found Gabriel's testimony. The prosecution team had a precise timeline of events and took Gabriel through everything. Maura learned that Bobby Marino kept a locker at the bus station for all of his critical contacts. When they found the locker it held the key to the rest of the cards. The indictments followed when Bobby's papers revealed all of the players. The FBI put their own under surveillance. The evidence was clean, Maura knew. All of the agents made sure every step was checked and re-checked.

She checked her watch when Gabriel finished the cross examination by the defense. Gabriel had been on the stand for just under four hours. Maura didn't know if the judge would recess for the evening and pick everything back up the next morning. Both attorneys approached the bench for just such a conversation.

"I'm being asked by the prosecution to run a little longer this evening as they wish to call their next witness immediately after Agent Dean. I'm going to allow it. Prosecution, call your next witness, please."

"Thank you, your honor. The prosecution calls Detective Jane Rizzoli to the stand."

Maura gave a gasp and turned to the courtroom doors. They swung open and Jane stepped inside. Jane's eyes flicked over Maura's face but her expression was unreadable. Maura tried to stand but crumpled to the floor instead.

"Maura?" she heard Agent Dean's voice. Maura struggled to open eyes and sit up. She was on a gurney outside of the courtroom. "We called the paramedics and brought you out of the courtroom," he explained. Maura nodded. She tried to ask questions but found it difficult to breathe, much less speak.

"Maura, I wanted to tell you but I couldn't. We couldn't compromise the case. Now you know why the charges were changed to exclude murder." Maura's eyes never left Dean's face.

"Jane?" she managed to ask. Dean sighed.

"She's on the stand right now, Maura. Jane helped us pick you up off the floor when you fainted, just so you know." Maura nodded. She felt cold inside, the way she did whenever she was handed a shock.

"Ma'am, shall we take you to the ER?" the paramedic asked. Maura shook her head. "No, I'm fine. I think Agent Dean here can escort me home."

"You don't want to stay?" he asked.

"I'm done here," she said. Maura stood and left the courthouse without looking back.

"Let me fill you in," Dean started to say on the ride home.

"No, Gabriel, I don't need any information. Thanks anyway. I think I'd just like to enjoy the ride," Maura replied. Dean, shocked, just drove her home. Maura declined his offer to see her to her apartment.

"Gabe? Where's Maura?" Jane asked as she rushed out of the courtroom.

"I just dropped her off at her apartment."

"What did you tell her?" Jane wanted to know. Dean looked uncomfortable.

"Nothing. She didn't want to hear anything I had to say. Wanted to enjoy the ride in silence." Jane's heart sank into her shoes. She wanted to see Maura, to hold her, tell her how she felt about her. Now it didn't look like Maura was interested in hearing anything.

"I'll go over to her apartment, she'll be more comfortable talking to me there."

"You want a ride?" Dean asked.

"No, I'm okay. I know where she lives."

"You might not, Janie. Maura moved last year right after your—funeral. Told Frost there were too many memories and she couldn't get over you," Dean said this as he stared at his shoes. He hated to hurt Jane in this way.

"Then give me her address, Gabe."

Twenty minutes later Jane stood before Maura's new apartment. She hesitated before knocking. Despite thinking over this situation over the past year she didn't quite know what to say. Oh well, she thought, I guess an apology would work.

Maura answered the door after the second knock.

"I guess I expected to see you sometime this evening," she said coldly. "Why are you here?"

"I wanted to see my best friend," Jane answered. She knew this was going to be harder than she thought.

"She died a year ago," Maura answered. A pain sliced through Jane's heart.

"I know this is difficult, Maura, but please, for our friendship, hear me out?" Jane pleaded. Maura looked at her for a moment then motioned for Jane to enter.

"I like this new place, Maura. You always did have good taste."

Maura sat down on the sofa. "Too many memories in the old place, Jane, memories that kept haunting me. I had to move. Now, I agreed to hear your side of the story, because of our past friendship." Maura emphasized the word "past." Jane didn't know how to respond. She sat on the sofa and reached for Maura's hand. Maura moved out of Jane's reach.

"Maura, please. I had to do this. There was no other way to get a conviction."

"Agent Dean said all of the evidence was found through Marino's personal effects they found at the bus station. What did they need you for?" Maura's voice was stone cold.

"The decision to do this was made before I regained consciousness. Agent Andrews was found packing up his personal items in the FBI office barely an hour after Marino's death. Dean came here and had me moved to New York. They put me in the witness protection program until Andrews' trial. Once his conviction is obtained I am free to resume my old life."

"That's not going to be easy, Jane. You're dead, remember?"

"Yeah, well, Maura, I'm here to tell you I'm very much alive."

"What about your parents? Did they know?"

"No, they didn't. I was over at their house last night. They weren't planning on being in the courthouse today so I went to see them. Agent Dean went with me so Ma wasn't seeing ghosts."

"How did they take it when they found out you're alive?"

Jane sighed. "Not good. Ma stood up and slapped me when I went in."

"Gee, I wonder why she felt that way, Jane," Maura said sarcastically.

"Come on, Maura, you have to believe me-"

"No, Jane, I don't," Maura interrupted. "If you knew what we all went through. I barely made it through the service. I went home and collapsed. I literally walked into my apartment and screamed. I was on the floor, sobbing like my heart was going to break. I was beating my hands on the floor screaming why did it have to be you?" Maura started to cry again, thinking of the pain she felt when Jane died. Jane moved over to hold Maura but Maura stood up.

"I think it's time for you to leave," she said. "You've explained, now go."

"Maura, please, you were my best friend," Jane pleaded.

"Were. Past tense. Implies something is in the past, over, finished. You shouldn't have put me through this, Jane. You should have trusted me to keep your secret."

"Maura, please don't do this. It's been agony over the past year. I wondered how you were coping with things. I couldn't tell anyone, see anyone. I felt like I was dead."

"You are dead, Jane. You're dead to me. I can't understand how you can tell me you care about me while putting me through this. Goodbye," Maura said and shut her door.

The next day in the courtroom Jane responded automatically to any questions she was asked but she was a robot. Dean watched Jane go through the motions and knew what the problem must be.

Dean knew where the autopsy room was located in the Boston PD headquarters and he went straight into it. He found Dr. Isles performing an autopsy.

"Dr. Isles, we need to talk," he said.

"No we don't, Agent Dean. I'm all talked out."

"Jane had no choice in this. She was told she had to do it."

"Is that what Jane told you?"

"No, I haven't spoken to her since yesterday. She's crap on that witness stand right now-"

"And that isn't my problem, Agent Dean. If you're here to champion Jane's cause you can save your breath."

"I understand how angry you must be, but this really wasn't Jane's fault, Maura. Blame me."

"Why you, Agent Dean?"

"I made the arrangements and had Jane transferred to New York before she was conscious. That evening of the shooting Jane regained consciousness right after being admitted to the hospital in New York. I was by her bedside. She woke up and asked after Frankie and then you. She couldn't seem to understand why you weren't there. I explained to her that she was in a different hospital."

"Go on, Agent Dean."

"I'm glad you're listening. When I told Jane she was in a different hospital she thought I meant a hospital different from you. She tried to get out of bed, to get to you. I had to explain very quickly that I had her moved and that you weren't injured."

Maura listened carefully and tried to ignore how her heart lurched when Dean said that Jane thought Maura had been injured and tried to get to her.

"Not a day went by that Jane didn't ask after you. I argued with her all of the time that she had to stay in the witness protection program until the trial started."

"She doesn't have to stay in the program anymore, Agent Dean?" he hesitated.

"Jane may need to be in the program if we don't get a conviction, Maura, but we think we'll be successful."

Maura said nothing, just completed her autopsy.

"Maura, please see her. Jane's going nuts. She's nothing more than a robot on the stand today."

"Are you concerned about not getting a conviction if Jane isn't herself, Agent?"

Dean sighed. "No, I'm afraid she'll kill me if she's lost you because of what I did." Maura enjoyed a small smile at Dean's discomfort.

"All right. I'll be there this afternoon."

Jane stood outside the courtroom discussing the afternoon's strategy with the prosecutor when she noticed someone who looked like Maura out of the corner of her eye. Looking up she saw Maura watching her. Jane gave a tentative smile. Maura smiled in return and Jane felt relief flood her body.

"We'll talk later, ok?" Jane asked. Maura nodded and went through the line and into the courtroom.

The afternoon session moved quickly but not quickly enough for Jane. The minute the judge gaveled the afternoon session ended she was at Maura's side.

"Let's go to The Dirty Robber, ok Jane? We'll sit in a corner and talk."

The last booth in the far corner was available. Jane and Maura slid into it and ordered their usual. Jane was getting some odd looks but the news was now out and she was getting used to people staring at her. Today the only one she wanted looking at her was Maura, her best friend. Jane reached across the table and took Maura's hand.

"If you only knew how much I missed you this past year," Jane said. Maura nodded.

"That's what Agent Dean said."  
"Gabe came to talk to you?"

"Yes, this morning. Said you were crap on the witness stand because we weren't talking. I listened, then decided to be there this afternoon."

"Maura, if I had the chance to call you, talk to you, I would have," Jane fervently hoped she believed her. Maura nodded.

"Dean explained. How he had you transferred before you were awake. You were forced into the witness protection program in order to testify today."

"I also helped him with some of the investigation," Jane said. The two women were silent. Jane still had Maura's arm. Now she looked up at Maura with tears in her eyes.

"Maura, honey, if I could have prevented you any pain, I would have. I love you too much to do that to you. I couldn't bear to think of what you were going through. Dean was at my funeral. He said you barely made it through the service and couldn't go to the cemetery. When he told me I cried for days. I was aching to hold you and tell you all would be okay when I came back."

"I know, but Jane, when you died…my life, I just couldn't see how I could bear losing you. The doctor came out and briefly, matter of fact, said you'd died twenty minutes earlier. I fainted then. Frost caught me. And when I went home from your funeral? I literally closed my apartment door and screamed. Then I collapsed on the floor. I was on that floor, Jane, for two days. I couldn't move. My eyes swelled from crying so much. How can I forgive you and move on? I don't know that I can trust you, Jane. What if something happens in the future? What do I do? Insist on inspecting the coffin to make sure you're really in there?" Jane listened, her heart twisting. She had the image of Maura collapsing on the floor stuck in her mind. She took Maura's hand and kissed it as her tears started to fall.

Maura stroked Jane's hand while her friend cried. She realized she was just so empty of emotions. The shock of seeing Jane had worn off and Maura knew she still loved Jane just as much as before the shooting.

"Jane, that day in the hospital-I realized I love you. I wanted to tell you that, tell you I wanted us to date. I wanted us to be a couple."

"Wanted? Past?" Maura dropped her gaze.

"Jane, thinking you were dead, part of my anguish was that I didn't have the chance to tell you how I felt. I lost that chance."

"And now?"

"It's a matter of trust. You betrayed me in the worst way, Jane. I have to go. I'll see you around, Jane." Maura grabbed her keys and purse and left. Jane stared after her, wishing she could chase after Maura, hold her until the two of them were back to normal. Now she wasn't sure if anything could ever be the same.

Maura wasn't surprised to see Dean waiting for her in the morgue. She had a restless, sleepless night. When she could sleep she kept dreaming of Jane lying in her casket, calling out to her. Maura found herself waking several times in the night, her heart pounding.

"What now, Agent Dean?"

"I think I should tell you something else, Maura."

"There's more? I don't know, Agent Dean, I can't keep up with you," Maura said sarcastically.

"I thought if you and Jane got back together I wouldn't have to tell you this, but I guessed from Jane's pain you two aren't together."

"This time tell me everything, please. I'm getting tired of being told all of this in chapter format."

"Fair enough. Two weeks after Jane's shooting we were going through all of the evidence, setting up the surveillance, things like that. It looked like such a sure thing I started thinking we didn't need Jane. I told her to gather up her stuff. I was going to bring her home to you, explain what happened."

"And?"

"Jane was ecstatic. She gathered her stuff, hugged me, and we came home. We drove up in front of your apartment. Jane was halfway out of the car when my phone rang."

"Jane-was here?" Dean nodded.

"If you'd have looked out of your apartment window you would have seen a ghost practically dancing on your front walk. Jane was so happy. Said she was finally going to have the chance to tell you of her feelings."

"So what happened?"

"My phone call was from the Commissioner. A new wrinkle in our case had just developed and it was too dangerous for Jane to resurrect herself. She was devastated, let me tell you. She cried for days. But when we showed her the evidence Jane knew it was important for her to see this through."

"So what evidence was this, Dean?"

"We had a small leak of information, Maura, and one of the defendants was going to try to blackmail us. We received some photographs Maura, and Jane went nuts when she saw them."

Maura just stared up at the detective. Dean was definitely uncomfortable.

"The photos were of you, Maura. Several shots of you entering or leaving your building, day and night and Jane knew she had to protect you."

Maura didn't know how to respond. Suddenly she needed to see Jane.

Court had recessed for an early lunch. Maura found Jane standing in the middle of several federal agents, reviewing the morning session. Maura walked into the middle of the circle and grabbed Jane's wrist.

"Jane? Can I talk to you?" she asked. Without waiting for a reply she tugged on Jane's arm and led the detective into the restroom.

"Maura? Is everything okay?" Jane asked. Maura slammed the restroom door shut and locked it. She slammed Jane up against the wall and kissed her senseless.

Jane didn't know how to react at first. Maura's kisses deepened and Jane felt herself relax into the doctor's embrace. She wrapped her arms around Maura and leaned into her. After a few minutes she pulled back for some air and looked into Maura's eyes.

"I was afraid I'd never have a chance to tell you, either, Maura. I fell in love with you a long time ago but I never dreamed you felt the same."

"We were best friends, Jane. I never had a friend like you before. I was afraid of losing you. I didn't want to take the chance. Then that terrible day.." Maura found she couldn't stop the tears from falling. She leaned into Jane's embrace and sobbed into the detective's shoulder. "That day I vowed to tell you if you woke up. The doctor said you'd died and I wanted to die right then and there." Jane's embrace tightened around Maura.

"I am so sorry, sweetheart. I promise I will never put you through anything like this ever again. No matter what. Maura, I love you more than life itself."

"Yes, Dean told me about the night you nearly came home."

Jane chuckled. "You should have seen me. We were right outside your apartment, Maura. When his phone rang and he told me we had to leave I felt like you died. I wanted to run up and tell you not to worry, that I was okay. Dean showed me the pictures and I knew I had to protect you."

Maura reached up and stroked Jane's cheek with her hand. Jane clasped her hand over Maura's wrist. The doctor reached up and lightly kissed Jane on the lips.

"Let's go home, Jane. We have a lot of catching up to do."

The End


End file.
